There are many times when you have been harmed or hurt, and someone IS responsible. In these cases, it is right to name what happened and by whom. Please note that this article isn’t about those cases; this has in mind the times when bad things happen or when you are overwhelmed and there is no one directly responsible… and why our minds turn to blame. When life falls apart, our minds ask the same questions almost automatically. Whose fault is this? Why did this happen? Who failed me? Whether...

Few pieces of relationship wisdom are quoted more often than, “Don’t let the sun go down on your anger.” For generations, many couples have interpreted that to mean, “We have to solve this tonight.” While that interpretation is well intentioned, it has likely caused unnecessary pain for many relationships. When emotions are running high, forcing yourselves to stay up until the issue is resolved often does the exact opposite of what you hoped. Instead of creating reconciliation, it creates...

You know that feeling you get when your brand new pair of Nikes or Birkenstocks comes in? They feel great on your feet; they’re new and flawless. But even if you keep those Nikes in pristine condition, they eventually become less exciting. Feel less good. And over time, they end up in the back of your closet with last year’s pair. This is the brain’s process of habituation. Habituation is a fundamental, non-associative learning process where an organism's behavioral or physical response to a...